March for Life

Circling around the Capitol Building, I observed many others gathering to express their opposition to abortion. By the time I reached the National Mall, many thousands more arrived; a broad mix of Catholics, Evangelicals, and Jews.

A group of Catholic nuns clutched oversize rosaries, while hundreds of priests wearing their black robes and white clerical collars led parochial school children in procession. Many carried banners depicting the Virgin of Guadalupe, or other religious icons.

Never before have I personally witnessed such a demonstration on a national level. Bus loads of Evangelical school children wore matching sweatshirts with brightly colored slogans like, "Yo Mama Chose Life," or "Face it, Abortion Kills."

I overheard conversations that were both urgent and informative. An orthodox Jew explained to his children how this event was organized on a such a large scale. A Christian minister urged a young woman to to make a pledge promising to tell at least ten other people about pro-life issues. A young college age man spoke passionately to a small group of listeners about joining a "pro-life activist training camp." Still others stood on street corners urging me to "Vote Brownback for president; 100% pro-life."

I have to admit, the March for Life had a much more profound effect than I would have expected. Several times, I felt like crying because of the divisiveness of this issue upon our country. I'm sad to say I don't foresee any resolution in the near future.

World War II Memorial

I paused to honor my grandfather Gibson J. Eli and Rhonda's grandfather James Carl Merchant, for their valiant service in the Second World War. This memorial honors their memory.

The Lincoln Memorial

I always feel a sense of reverence when I visit the Lincoln Memorial. Apparently others feel it too. When I visited on Monday, a young man was taking a photograph of his friends inside the memorial. I overheard him say, "Hey! Stop making gang signs for the picture!"

The other kids laughed, but he became very adamant, "I'm serious. Don't make those signs in here."

They laughed again, to which he said, "I'm dead serious. Don't make those signs while you're here." They finally relented, and I was very proud of him for respecting this sacred place.

Vietnam Memorial

Myles D. Westman was my uncle's friend during the Vietnam War; and while I don't know the whole story, I know he died when my uncle Richard lived. When I found his name on the wall, a wave of unexpected emotion brought tears to my eyes. I bless his memory and pray for my uncle. More on this later...

The White House

The White House on a cold Monday afternoon, as seen from Pennsylvania Avenue; just moments before, the presidential helicopter landed on the South Lawn, but I didn't focus my camera in time.

Cold and Alone

When I was a child, I used to have this horrible, recurring dream about getting lost in a strange, faraway city. I would find myself wandering the dark, gray streets feeling cold and desperately alone. The crowds of people hardly paused to notice my distress, and those who saw me seemed to look with suspicion. Pitifully, I searched in vain to find my parents, friends, or relatives.

On some level, I was always a stranger, even among my closest friends.

As I did my errands in downtown Spokane this week, I was reminded of my childhood dreams. On days like today, I sometimes wish I could hibernate during the bleakest months of winter, and awake when the air is warm and the sun shines brightly in the sky.

Wedding Announcement

Once again, Jenny Wiltse has asked me to photograph a special occasion in her life. Some time last year I took her senior pictures, and just this afternoon I photographed Jenny and her fiance Joshua Alent for their wedding announcement. They plan to marry in the Manti Utah Temple of the LDS Church.

We returned to Manito Park and Duncan Gardens for the photo shoot. We also took a few pictures on Manito Boulevard, between the frost covered trees. This is my favorite, though I suspect they may choose a different shot for their announcement.

Manito Park and Duncan Gardens

The Rose Garden at Manito Park...


The fountain at Duncan Gardens...

I spent the afternoon scoping out potential sites to photograph Jenny and her fiance Josh. They plan on getting married in March and asked me to photograph their wedding announcements. If you recall, I also did her senior pictures a while back.

They want a winter background to their pictures, and we had thought about Mount Spokane, but it's been too cold. We decided to visit Manito Park and Duncan Gardens. Even in winter, they possess a certain elegance and charm. I'm excited to do this for them. I only hope the weather will cooperate tomorrow.

Visiting the Garden

McKenna was happy to model at Duncan Gardens and Manito Park, that is, until the cold started to settle into her hands. After that, she could only think of leaving.

The Conservatory

Gaiser Conservatory at Manito Park is an oasis of color and warmth during the cold winter months. Sadly, it will not be open tomorrow when I take pictures for Jenny and her fiance.

The Spokane River in White

The Spokane River under the cold winter chill; beautiful and bright. I feel blessed to live in a region with so many natural resources and beauty.

Canada Island

This photograph was taken on the suspension bridge leading to Canada Island, looking south toward downtown Spokane. The mist rising up from the river left the trees and branches a beautiful white.

Deep Freeze

An arctic blast descended upon the Spokane area, pushing sub-zero temperatures onto all the region. We've settled into a miserable deep freeze, hoping for an early thaw. Earlier tonight, I went outside with wet hair, and within 60 seconds, my hair froze into a solid, and rather stylish looking spike. It reminded me of the crown worn by the ice witch of Narnia.

I really hate the cold. I mean, I really hate the cold. Even so, it casts an eerie beauty over all the land. Just an hour ago, I drove through downtown Spokane, and the falls under the Monroe Street Bridge created a beautiful cloud of steam. Despite the obvious discomfort of stepping outside my warm car, I had to stop to get a couple pictures. It was worth the momentary misery.

Teaching the GED

My schedule with the community colleges changed somewhat this quarter to include teaching GED classes at the Hillyard Center. I absolutely love it! Whether I'm tutoring math, or teaching someone how to improve their essay writing, I truly enjoy my work. This is the kind of teaching that gives my life meaning.

I took the photograph shown above between meetings at the Adult Education Center on Monroe and the HIllyard Center. The picture shows a portion of the Spokane Falls at Riverfront Park.

Remembering the Dead

Jesuit Cemetery at Mount Saint Michael...

Today is the 13th anniversary of my father's death. His birthday passed only a few days ago. Every year I pause to remember during this week.

A little after 2:00 in the morning, my dogs freaked out and started barking, which they NEVER do. It woke me out of a dead sleep and sent me running down the hall pumping with adrenaline. Even my girls woke up and panicked, asking, "Daddy, what's the matter?" I let the dogs out the back door and they ran straight to the back fence, on the opposite side of where they normally go.

I don't know what made my dogs bark, but it left me with a creepy feeling for more than an hour. Being the anniversary of my father's death, it brought up many unsettled feelings I still carry.

The photograph above represents my thoughts toward the dead. The Jesuit Cemetery at Mount Saint Michael bears a stone with this inscription:

While others find this place
Deserted, it will be
Ever pulsing with life
For me.

For over simple stones
On this wind-caressed height
A host of vibrant men
Stand bright.

Their eyes and words more clear
Than any I now know
To all the crowded town
Below.

I see the living here,
Though spirits may have fled,
And moving numbly there,
The dead.

~John Masterson.

Hairspray

Rhonda and I got tickets to see the Broadway musical Hairspray as a Christmas gift. We went to the show this afternoon and had a wonderful time. The production is something of a twisted comedy, bordering on ridiculous, but if I'm in the right mood, I end up laughing my head off when I watch it. As things turned out, the mood was perfect. We laughed and kept on laughing long after the show ended.

Through all our laughter, there really is a serious message underneath the crazy jokes by Edna Turnblad and company. The story brings us back to the days of segregation and the resulting struggle to integrate the races. I wonder how much we learned from the Civil Rights Movement, and how far we have to go.

National Mourning

Rhonda and I walked through Riverfront Park this afternoon, and saw the massive flag by the American Pavilion still stands at half mast. Flags everywhere continue to mark the grief of a nation at the loss of President Gerald Ford.

You know, I was just a wee lad during the Nixon years. I have no direct memory of the end of the Vietnam War, Watergate, Nixon's resignation, and his subsequent presidential pardon. What little I know comes from the popular culture and political re-hashing of my childhood America. I have nothing of consequence to add to the national dialog; however, I will make one observation:

I grew up around people who demonized the Nixon-Ford scandal, and regarded the pardon with special contempt. How is it possible now, with the president's passing, he is treated like a hero by all who remember him? As I read the eulogies from conservatives and liberals alike, I began to think he really was a great man for his times. Regardless of his legacy, either positive or negative, I find the political climate of our age conflicting and downright disgusting. How can a person be a villain during life, and become a hero after death? If we were truly honest, and if we could put aside the bitterness of partisanship, I think we would find the truth lies somewhere in the middle. In truth, there are very few honest-to-goodness demons or villains in the world. Most of us are just people following our conscience the best we know how.

Winter in Spokane

Friday afternoon, I went downtown to the District 81 office to request a form for my continuing teacher certificate. Afterwards, I was able to spend a few bone-chilling moments photographing Riverfront Park, and the Spokane River; beautiful, in its own miserable way (I hate the cold).

Today was also my father's 59th birthday, if in fact he were still alive. They tell me he was born during a terrible snowstorm on this very day back in 1948; at Sacred Heart. His mother arrived at the hospital with no time to spare, and delivered barely 15 minutes later. Monday will be the 13th anniversary of his passing. Ironically, his death also occurred at Sacred Heart, though it rained that day, as I recall it.

Today I feel a light wind piercing my jacket with its icy tentacles, and a slight skiff of snow falls gently to the ground. The old people say the snow covers our tracks from the previous year, but no amount of cold, rain, wind, or snow will cover the memories in my heart.

Barbed Wire

Sometimes beauty emerges from the details. Nothing about a chain-link fence with a barbed wire top would seem appealing, and yet this close-up shot creates a much different effect; it looks forbidding and harsh, almost like it has a story to tell. And sometimes, black and white makes ordinary photographs even more compelling. I would certainly have lost something if I had taken the picture farther away. It would have ended in a blurry jumble of gray lines with no real meaning.

Seasonal Affective Disorder

The sadness I feel during the long winter months is very real, prompting me to seek colors and light in my surrounding environment to fend off the effects of prolonged darkness and overcast skies.

Seasonal Affective Disorder is said to be rare in the tropics, but noticeably common above 30 degrees north, and below 30 degrees south. Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is directly related to decreased exposure to daylight during the winter months, and causes depressive symptoms in people who otherwise enjoy good mental health. Treatments range from light therapy to anti-depressant medication to cognitive based therapies.

My approach to addressing feelings of sadness during the dark winter months depends primarily on cognitive strategies. In fact, my photography serves a distinctly therapeutic purpose of helping me find beauty in the world when all I see is gray.

The photograph shown above represents my personal attempt to receive the light. Even though the sky had been overcast and gray throughout the day, and the drizzle made conditions positively miserable, just as the sun began to set, the sky illuminated a deep blue hue for the briefest of moments. The contrast between blue sky and the orange glow of street lights combined with the reflection of water on the field. I stopped my car and captured that moment.

With all I know about the feelings of darkness, it's no wonder the ancients hailed the return of light during the shortest day of the year; to bring hope of life's return. All this talk of light and darkness reminds me of a poem I read once. It would make a great prayer during this season of sadness:

In this fateful hour,
I call upon all Heaven with its power
And the sun with its brightness
And the snow with its whiteness
And the fire with all the strength it hath
And the lightning with its rapid wrath
And the winds in their swiftness along the path
And the sea with its deepness
And the rocks with their steepness
And the earth with its starkness.
All these I place,
By Heaven's almighty help and grace,
Between myself and the powers of darkness.

~ Traditional Rune.

Embrace the Gray

As I drive through city streets, the cold gray sky warms just enough to scatter rain over sheets of snow and ice. Warm enough for rain, yes, but still cold and wet and miserable. The blur of passing cars reflect on freezing asphalt, chilling my senses, numbing all sense of hope. At any moment I threaten to sink into a dark seasonal depression.

But then I remember to accept the rain falling on my head, for hardship waters the green grass of tomorrow. I embrace the gray, and find freedom from despair.

Happy New Year!!!

Our New Year's celebration did not turn out as planned.

We originally made big plans to stay at Ed's cabin for the night, but Whitney came home from church this afternoon looking positively green and complaining of a tummy ache. The other kids already had the stomach flu, so I was not about to drag our daughter an hour's drive away feeling as she did. We decided to stay home, and enjoy the New Year as a family.

I prepared more snack food than we could possible eat in one day; shrimp salsa, clam dip, cheese, crackers, summer sausage. I'm sure we all gained 10 pounds in one sitting!

In short, we played games, watched a couple movies, and then watched Dick Clark announce the New Year from Times Square in New York City. (Incidentally, that man looked forever young for at least the last 150 years, but it seems his age finally caught up with him). As they announced the New Year, my little family cheered and I snapped the first photograph of 2007 (above).

Blessings and joy to all this coming year!

Sparklers

Sparklers for the New Year, saved from the Fourth of July; I had forgotten all about them, but my children remembered. To think they waited half a year for ten seconds of flame, followed by fizzle. :)

Winter Days

Made an unexpected trip to Wellpinit this morning when a relative called to request my help moving. She's leaving the United States to accept a teaching post in Alberta, Canada. More on that later. It was a beautiful, bright winter day; excellent for taking pictures.

Lazy Days

Lazy days of Christmas break, and yet no time to blog...hmmm... What shall I do? Nothing to say at present, except that I'm looking forward to the new year.

This photograph is from the Spokane Reservation, showing the snow covered fields, reflecting moonlight.

The Nativity

My mother took my entire family to see the new Nativity movie. We enjoyed the film. I thought the depiction of the wise men was a little silly, but the actual birth of Jesus brought tears to my eyes; it is the story of the ages after all. For me, I just thought of the human side of both Joseph and Mary, and how they must have doubted and feared. And yet, in the end, so many people arrived to bear witness of the divine king. It was beautiful.

Monkeys for Christmas

Who would have thought monkeys would give my daughter her greatest delight Christmas morning? She received several monkey dolls and a Curious George movie. She was thrilled. My other children were equally happy with their gifts this year; Dakota received a Game Boy and McKenna received a remote control car. As their father, I received the blessing of knowing they were happy with their presents one more year.

Christmas Angels

Whitney and Shanoah as angels...

This evening, my extended family shared Christmas dinner and a small gift exchange with my wife and children. Everyone loved the turkey I cooked. Afterwards, the children wrote their own Christmas play based on the Nativity story. McKenna played the part of Mary, Dakota played Joseph, Kaleb played all three Wise Men, and Whitney and Shanoah played angels. They even quoted scripture with absolute innocence and perfection. It was beautiful.

Passing the Torch

Every year Glenda makes Christmas dinner, but I figured I'm getting old enough to to learn how to make a formal turkey dinner (at the tender age of 35). She coached me through the entire process, including the stuffing, candied yams, gravy, and more. It was delicious and just perfect! I never knew I could cook so well. I was so proud of that turkey, I had to include it on my blog. Everyone laughed at me when I pulled out my camera and tripod, but I don't care. This is an important moment in my life. ;)

Now Glenda says she'll never cook Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner again. She passed the torch to the next generation, and it will fall on me to prepare holiday meals in the future.

Dinner With Paul

The Merchant Family Christmas dinner was greatly reduced this year, but still very pleasant. After Steve's passing, his wife and kids decided to escape Christmas altogether and take an extended road trip. We had a much smaller dinner than usual with Paul and his family.

During our visit, McKenna decided she wanted me to take pictures with her. She chose the backgrounds and poses. It was kind of funny, actually. She was so adamant. This one was the best.

Winter Night

The ancient songs move under a darkened winter sky, heavy with grief mingled with destiny; for the tears of previous generations bring the promise of new lives growing up from the frozen earth. And when the spring comes again and showers the land with warmth, the shadow of our pain will water the green grass and make flowers bloom upon the fields of the heart.

Solstice on the Hill

Walking down the hill...

A group of friends observed the Winter Solstice on Edward's hill with prayer, songs, and fellowship. Afterwards, we enjoyed a hot bowl of soup and singing Christmas carols, accompanied by guitar. What a wonderful evening!

Good King Wenceslas

A member of Rhonda's ward asked me to sing a part in "Good King Wenceslas" at the ladies Relief Society Christmas devotional. I can't tell you the last time I sang in an LDS ward, but I agreed to participate in exchange for the good press in the community. :)

I always associated King Wenceslas with Christmas, but I never knew the story. Actually, the Feast of Stephen mentioned in the song falls the day after Christmas on December 26, and "King" Wenceslas was actually a duke in one of the ancient kingdoms of Middle Europe. He was known for his kindness to the poor and for promoting Christianity to the people of that region. I understand he died as a martyr for the faith before the age of 30.

The ladies did a marvelous job describing the origins of many well-known and beloved Christmas hymns. Many songs came as a result of direct inspiration, and several even appeared in dreams. It reminded me of something I once heard my father say when I was still a youth. He said all songs come from dreams, even the ones we hear on the radio or in church. The songs have a spirit, even if we don't know it. He mainly referred to Native American songs, but he included all songs in his belief.

Whatever the case, the Spirit of Christmas certainly lives in the music.

The Princess

People hear me say my daughter reminds me of a princess, but I rarely discuss my reasons for saying so. McKenna certainly demonstrates a sense of royal entitlement, and often expresses admiration for the reigning families of the world, both past and present. Whenever she plays make-believe, she usually commands the others with a calm regal directive, fully expecting her subjects will follow and obey. When I arrived home from work this afternoon, I found her playing in the front yard with her sister. She wore a green princess dress, which originally belonged to Whitney, I might add. Of course, I can't help smile. She is such an adorable princess after all.

Evidence of the Storm

Several days ago, a windstorm knocked out power to more than 1.5 million people throughout Washington and Oregon. Apparently, several people even died as a result of flooding and falling objects. On the other hand, Spokane saw very little by way of physical damage, but the wind did uproot this tree across the street from my workplace on North Market Street.

Let the Children Sing

A teacher at Dakota's school heard him singing and invited him to record backup music for a CD he's making. He went to a studio with several other classmates and recorded "Let the Children Sing." I'm very proud of his accomplishment and his talent for music.

Mahatma Gandhi

Rhonda rented the movie Gandhi, released in 1982. I vaguely remember seeing clips of the film in high school, but I was not prepared for the deeply emotional response I would have as we watched tonight. Especially toward the end, when he fasted for the end of violence between Hindus and Muslims, his devotion to forgiveness and non-violence moved me to tears. I'm not sure I could ever possess such greatness of character as he demonstrated throughout his life.

In the film, Gandhi said to man who killed a Muslim child in retaliation for the death of his own son by Muslims, "I know a way out of hell. Find a child, a child whose mother and father have been killed, a little boy about this high, and raise him as your own. Only be sure that he is a Muslim and that you raise him as one." Who knows if Gandhi ever truly uttered those words? Nevertheless, such deep forgiveness truly is divine.

An internet search gives the source for this quote as a Reader's Digest article from February 1992, though I have not yet confirmed it.

New Camera Arrived

The new camera arrived; same model as before: the Kodak EasyShare z760. Whitney is posing here for my debut blog with my restored photographic abilities. Awesome.

My Life

I've been slacking in the blog department, mostly because I've not had a camera, and honestly, a blog without pictures is pretty boring. But just in case people were wondering, this is a detailed play by play of my life over the last few days:

1. My hours will be cut back next quarter at work. Damn.
2. I substituted for a life-skills class on the AEC. Fun.
3. My family got to see Derrick.
4. We sweat on Friday.
5. Thrya served some great soup afterwards.
6. Had dinner with Glenda's Ukrainian co-workers.
7. John and Michaeline invited us dancing for their anniversary. Funny.
8. Hip hop isn't my favorite.
9. Practiced singing "Good King Wencenslas" at church.

Disappointment

A while back, I applied for a full-time job with the college, and even interviewed for the position. Well, I received a call today saying someone else got the job. I'm feeling the sting of disappointment, but I'm still hopeful something better will come along.

New Camera Ordered

I can't stand it any longer; I had to order a new camera. Last year I waited until Christmas, but this year I turned to eBay, and won the bidding with a moderate discount. This will be my only Christmas present gift this year, but I don't care. Life is bland without the ability to take pictures. Now that's the sign of a true addict, isn't it?

Christmas Pageant

Our neighbors invited us to watch the Best Christmas Pageant Ever at the Whitworth Community Presbyterian Church. Most of their family members had a role in the play. When I was a kid, this particular show was one of my favorite Christmas productions. Sorry, still no pictures.

His Lordship the Governor of Virginia

Dakota's school did a re-enactment of Colonial America, with each student acting a specific part from that time period. Dakota played the part of Governor Francis Fauquerer of colonial Virginia, and of course, he gave his speech with the best British accent out of everyone. He is such an aristocrat by nature, and a master actor.

I borrowed the camera from the neighbors, which I think you can tell by the quality of the pixels. Oh, I miss my camera.

Belief Creates Experience

I've heard it said the world reflects our inner experience. In other words, what we believe about the world actually creates our experience. People who see only darkness find plenty of things to confirm their perception. On the other hand, people who see goodness also find experiences to support their view of reality.

This concept re-appeared in my life this morning.

Driving south on Monroe Street, the angle of the sun made the wet pavement look like a shining silver ribbon. The beauty of it caught me off guard. I had been somewhat preoccupied with rather mundane concerns up to that moment, but I suddenly found myself vaulted into an experience of transformation and awe. For one brief instant, the world was filled with spirit and love.

That experience made me reflect on what I see when I look at the world. What kind of life do I live? Is my life as happy and fulfilled as I would like? If not, what do I need to change about my BELIEFS such that I have a different experience?

Hostage Crisis

Empire Glass on Newport Highway provided glass to replace a window pane at our house. As I drove up to their place of business, I saw dozens of police officers and a gaggle of news vehicles next door, with transmission towers looming over the parking lot at the Ramada Inn. As it turns out, some guy is holding his girlfriend hostage in one of the rooms. It's a crazy turn of events right here in my own neighborhood, and here I am with no camera. Sadly, I know little more than that.

Read more about it here: KXLY.

Stolen Camera

Sadly, my camera was stolen earlier this evening. I only want to say my previous camera was broken last year about this time, so I'm wondering if I have some kind of camera curse. What's up with that anyway? I'm feeling kind of lost and pathetic without it.

Well, I'm taking up a collection to buy a new one. Anyone interested in supporting me in this?

Hallelujah Chorus

The choir singing the Hallelujah Chorus.

For the third year in a row, Matthew Cudney invited me to the Messiah Sing-Along at First Presbyterian Church in downtown Spokane. This year his mother and sister flew in from California to join us. We had a very enjoyable time.

Oh, Christmas Tree...

My sister and I took the kids for a drive in the woods to cut down our own Christmas trees. The ones we find in nature never look quite as pretty or full, but when it comes to saving $50 or more, I think it's well worth the trouble. Actually, we had a great time trekking through the snow to find the "perfect" one. For one brief moment, the sun broke through the clouds and created this amazing view. Some moments really are perfect.

We stopped for a few minutes at my uncle Pat's house and Tony drove up on his snowmobile. He offered to let me drive, so I spent the next hour or so giving the kids a turn to ride. I'm usually quite reserved when it comes to danger and speed, but by the end, I found myself going quite fast. The kids loved it, so I'm sure we'll go again.

Wedding Reception

Mr. and Mrs. Jordyn Archer.

My wife and I were invited to sing for our friend's wedding, but as it turns out, they decided to get married before and not tell anyone. They solemnized their union at the Hitching Post in Coeur d'Alene, with only the Justice of the Peace and each other as witnesses. No matter; we ended up singing for the reception instead. That was fun. It was especially fun to MAKE fun of Jordyn. In this picture, he refused to smile for me, so this is what he gets. (Jordyn, you were warned).

Jordyn's mother held the reception in her home, and I must say the place was beautiful. I don't care what anyone says, marriage is a sacred event no matter where it happens.

Under the Moon

Downtown Spokane almost looks deserted under the twilight moon with hardly any lights in the buildings, and one lonely tree seeming to stand taller than the city. Actually, to get this view, I had to hike down a steep hillside near Peaceful Valley. With all the snow and ice and my tread-less shoes, I almost slid downhill into the river below. Seriously. I had to grab hold of whatever vegetation I could find to stop myself from falling over the edge. That would have been fun, or not. Despite the obvious danger, I think this picture was worth it.

Snow Covering

I woke up and saw the land covered with snow... oh wait, that was a few days ago. I've been slacking and haven't posted since we came home from Seattle. This is a photograph of the blue spruce in our front yard from our first major snow the other day. Isn't it beautiful?