Wonder

I had an interesting conversation this morning about life. A friend was telling me about a void he often feels, like a hole in his heart. He said he used to drink and party so people would accept him, but he realized that wasn't the way.

As I looked across at him, he seemed so young and earnest, as though I might suddenly tell him the secret to life. Unfortunately, I could only say I often feel the same, and like him, I know partying is not the answer.

I felt myself floundering for a moment, like perhaps I had disappointed him for not saying something more inspired. How had I allowed myself to forget my own values and beliefs? Yes, I often feel something missing, but then I remember simple things like gratitude. Just the other day, I remember digging roots and feeling overcome with emotion. For one brief second, I felt deeply connected to my father and his fathers, and all our grandmothers and grandfathers. For one brief second, I saw one small piece of all that's real and I stood with wonder and awe.

Life is beautiful and all the world a Garden of Eden. Somehow we've forgotten, and so we live daily with suffering.

As I heard myself speaking these words, I am so thankful for the opportunity to remember my own wisdom and to choose something brighter than despair.