Saturday, August 29, 2009

Get-Away Car

Random Fact #3: I once drove a get-away car.

True story.

For obvious reasons, I felt nervous to reveal this sordid little detail about my life, but the statute of limitations passed more than 20 years ago, and besides, I was only a child when it happened.

When I was nine years old, I came back to Spokane to spend the summer with my father. He was still drinking then, so I'm sure his judgment was not the finest. We were staying in town one night when the beer ran dry. He turned to me and said, "Barry, let's go to the store. We're going to pick up some more beer."

"Okay," I said.

He pulled into the parking lot of our neighborhood grocery store and positioned the car into a convenient spot near the entrance. He left the engine running and motioned for me to sit in the driver's seat. "Really?" I beamed hopefully. He nodded and then went around the front of the car to take the passenger seat.

"Do your feet reach the pedals?" he quizzed.

"Just barely, but yes." I nodded. Enthusiastic.

"Good," he said, "So this is what's going to happen. I'm going to walk into the store and grab a case of beer. I'm not going to pay for it, so you'll wait for me in the car. Leave the engine running, and when I get back, you'll drive away. Do you understand?"

My smile faded.

"Do you understand?" he demanded.

"Yeah, but what if the cops come?" I asked.

"Then tell them you're waiting for me. No big deal."

Before I could protest further, he got out of the car and walked into the store. I could see him through the big windows walking to the beer aisle, casually and confidently, like he owned the place. He was suave and cool, but I was a wreck. My feet shook and my hands trembled against the steering wheel. I worried and agonized just wishing for the ordeal to end.

Finally, my father left the store with beer in hand. He sat in the passenger seat and said, "OK, drive."

Even with an automatic transmission, the car lurched and halted as we made our big get away. I think I only drove about a block before my father told me to stop and trade places. Mercifully, my life in crime ended.

As I look back, I'm glad to say my father didn't get me into crime any more than this one incident. A few years later, he stopped drinking, made his amends, and made a positive life change.

To review:

Random Fact #1: I was once a millionaire.
Random Fact #2: I was once an Earth Ambassador.
Random Fact #3: I once drove a get-away car.


cieldequimper said...

Could have been another life-changing experience. Maybe it was.

Chelle said...

My favorite seven random facts about my brother…

He wrote a book. When I was little my brother wrote a story about pickles who came from space, he drew all the pictures and put it in a hard cover binding. I was so impressed. Do you still have this book?

He built a city. Ok not a real city but it was awesome. I am not sure how long it took him to build this city but he made it all out of paper. He made little cars, helicopters, added moss trees and I think there was even an arch like the one you would see in St Louis. If I remember correctly after all that work, he eventually went Godzilla on it. Not sure what that was about… or maybe it was me?

He broke my tiba and fibula. I had to been about five years old and we were all playing on the back of my dad’s semi truck. It had an electric lift that went up and down. The wiring was bad or something and you had to actually touch the wires together to get it to move up and down. My sister and I remember this story differently. I remember sitting on the ground Barry was at the controls and my sister and other brother were on the lift. As the lift came down my sister told me to move my legs or they would get broken. I remember thinking, “I wonder what a broken leg would be like” so I moved them out of the way and then just before it came down stuck them back under.

He is a great storyteller. My favorite story was about some campers out in the woods who got eaten by Sasquatch. I remember that the story was very gruesome with heads being ripped off and such. He also said that if I thought of something to much that it would actually happen. So for years I was convinced that when I was taking a shower spiders would come out of the nozzle instead of water.

He told me I was going to die on the coast of California in a red convertible while driving with a friend around the age of 25. He was mistaken.

He was supposedly chased by KKK members. He told me him and his friends were chased by KKK member while crossing over the hills in Minihaha Park. I am not sure if that part of the story is true but the next day we went back to the park to investigate. When we got to the park we saw a white sheet far up on a rock. I thought it was a KKK outfit and I wanted to go get it. My brother convinced me it was a trap. He told me that it was put there so that we would go get and then they would attack us. I got scared and we ran back home.

He gets mad at me whenever I say I do not remember him from my childhood. I tell him it is probably a good thing I do not remember him because I usually only remember the bad things as is apparent from the above stories. I do know I always looked up to him. He says he took care of me when I was just a little girl, which I do not remember. I do remember when he took care of me when I was a teenager and was very sick. I was convinced I was dying and he did everything he could to make me comfortable.

Love ya brother

Barry Moses (Sulustu) said...

Sky of Quimper: I DO think this was a lifechanging experience, though I have to admit, I'm still pondering the lasting result.

Barry Moses (Sulustu) said...

Hey 'Chelle,

I'm very honored to think you have these memories of me, be they positive or negative.

To answer some of your questions, NO I do not have that book. I'm not sure what ever happened to it.

As for the city, I left it in your dad's basement when I went to Mexico. When I came back, I discovered that someone went Godzilla all over it. Many of the buildings were smashed and some of them had been shot to pieces with a BB gun. I never learned the true identity of our Godzilla, but I always though Brad was the guilty party. But then again, maybe it was you.... who knows?

I totally remember predicting your death. It's hilarious now, but I think you actually believed me. You know, it was always intended to be a joke. Yes, I admit, it was a very sick teenage joke, but it was a joke nonetheless.

As for the KKK, I really was chased by a group of people wearing white. Were they KKK? I don't really know.

As for breaking your leg.... I would totally DISPUTE your version of the story. You were, after all, too young to remember what happened; you couldn't have been more than 2 or 3. As I remember the story, we were all playing on that hydrolic lift on the back of the truck: you, me, Brad, Kim, Larry, and Shawn. The lift was such that you could not change the direction mid-stream. Once you pushed the button for it to go up, it had to go ALL the way up before it would go back down. It was the same in both directions.

Anyway, someone pushed the down button, and about half way, you slipped off and rolled under the lift. My first reaction was to push the UP button, but of course, it had no effect. The lift came to rest on top of your legs, and yes, the bones were broken in at least two places. I was terrified.

When you screamed, your dad came running out of the house. As I was the oldest, he blamed me, but let's not forget that I was only 8 or 9 years old. As a child, I was no more culpable for breaking your leg than for driving my father's get-away car. Your dad cradled you in his arms while he screamed at me, "What have you done to my baby??!?"

Later that evening, I got the belt, that is until mom rescued me. She stood up for me and said that the true blame rested on the ADULT (your dad) who allowed children to play on a hydrolic lift in the first place.

Even after mom rescued me, I felt guilty for years. Even after all these years, the memory of that day still stings, just a little.

Chelle said...

You shouldn't feel guilty. I don't remember it as a bad experience. I remember as more excting than anything. I got all sorts of presents and people carried me around the house. I still to this day swear I intentionaly put my legs under that thing. I may have fell off but I remember having the chance to pull my legs out. I remeber moving them and then puting them back.
Maybe Brad and I went Godzilla on the city together. It makes me sad cause it was so cool. I wonder why I would want to ruin it.
I bet you that book is somewhere. I remember seeing it when I was in my early teens.


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